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Saturday, October 28, 2006

 

How Would a Liberal Senator Webb Write Legislation? (Given that Webb Says His Novels are 'Inappropriate' for even News Radio to read 'on air')

I got a lot of amusement out of hearing the surfacing information about liberal Virginia Senatorial Candidate and Porn Author, Jim Webb, and the novels that he has written that are really demeaning to women and children.

I mean the stuff is so explicit, that Webb himself said that his novels are 'inappropriate' for News Radio or even Talk Radio to repeat on the air. Were talking Fathers having oral sex with sons, and strippers slicing bananas with their v******, you get the picture. How the hell Webb couldn't think that his porn style of writing would not become an issue in the campaign is mindboggling to me. Let me guess, Karl Rove made Webb think and write that crap by using mind control.

With all that, it got me to thinking. How would Webb, if elected to the Senate, write his legislation in the Senate? So I picked out some old legislation, changed a few names, and thought Webb slutty.

-----------------------------------------------------------

SJ 39 IS

109th CONGRESS

2d Session

S. J. RES. 39

To spur a political solution in Iraq and encourage the people of Iraq to provide for their own security through the redeployment of the United States military forces.

IN THE SENATE OF THE UNITED STATES


June 6, 2006

Mr. WEBB introduced the following joint resolution; which was read twice and referred to the Committee on Foreign Relations

JOINT RESOLUTION

To spur a political solution in Iraq and encourage the people of Iraq to provide for their own security through the redeployment of the United States military forces.

Whereas the United States military forces have served bravely in Iraq and deserve the heartfelt support of the United States;

Whereas Mrs. Boxer has the hots for Mrs. Clinton, and Mrs. Boxer would enjoy passing her tongue over and into Mrs. CLINTON's "honey pot," unleashing Mrs. Clinton's body into a hail of quivers;

Whereas Mrs. Boxer and Mrs. Clinton, would request private sessions with Mr. Kennedy and Mr. Dodd to recreate the famous Kennedy/Dodd "waitress sandwich" with Mrs. Boxer and Mrs. Clinton each taking their turn as the "waitress";

Whereas Mr. Webb, would request weekly oral servicings on the Senate Floor from Ms. Landrieu, with full rights to fully disrobe Ms. Landrieu, and demand she slice Mr. Webb's banana into several pieces with her "ax wound" while in the split position and having Ms. Landrieu's breasts shine brightly in the Senate Chamber lights;

Whereas more than 200 coalition personnel have been killed in support of military operations in Iraq;

Whereas, according to a January 2006 poll, 64 percent of Iraqis believe that crime and violent attacks will decrease when the United States redeploys from Iraq, 67 percent of Iraqis believe that their day-to-day security will increase if the United States redeploys from Iraq, and 73 percent of Iraqis believe that there will be greater cooperation among the political factions of Iraq when the United States redeploys from Iraq: Now, therefore, be it

Resolved by the Senate and House of Representatives of the United States of America in Congress assembled, That--

(1) United States military forces in Iraq are to be redeployed from Iraq by December 31, 2006, or earlier if practicable;

(2) nothing in this resolution prohibits the use of United States military forces from training Iraqi security forces in the region outside of Iraq; and

(3) nothing in this resolution prohibits the use of United States military forces based outside of Iraq to--

(A) conduct targeted and specialized counter-terrorism missions in Iraq; and

(B) protect military and civilian personnel of the United States in Iraq.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Now that would be some "HOT" legislation.


Uh, pardon me. But didn't the liberal media predict that St. Louis Cardinals were going to be smashed by the NY Mets in the NLCS. Well, they just beat the Detroit Tigers to win The World Series.

I can't quite place what the liberal media will be wrong with next, but I'm sure that it will come to me by the morning of November 8th.

Screw the Godless libs and the leaning-dem Mods!

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