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Sunday, March 27, 2005

 

Happy Easter - Renewal of Conservative Baptismal Promises

Dear friends,
through the political mystery,
we have been buried with liberalism in all aspects of life,
so that we as conservatives may rise above the fray of all liberal influence.
Now that we have completed our Conservative political observance,
let us renew the promises we made at our conservative baptism
when we rejected Bill Clinton and his works,
and promised to serve the Conservative movement as one faithfully serves their church.

UHLH: Do you reject Bill Clinton as Satan's representative on Earth, father of modern liberalism, and prince of darkness to the fathers of young girls and women? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject Bill Clinton's works, his library and massage parlor? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject Bill Clinton's empty promises? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject Hillary Clinton as a false Senator from New York? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject Hillary Clinton's works, her unannounced bid for president, and her maintanence of an unhealthy personal relationship with Bill for political purposes? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject Hillary Clinton's empty promises of moving to the right on life issues? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject abortion as elimination of a viable human being and future contributor to the Social Security program? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject euthanasia as an easy disposal of life for the convienence of the living? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject homosexuality? All: I do.

UHLH: Do you reject affirmative action? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject same sex marriage? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject liberal lawyers and all the evil they stand for? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject the evils of liberalism herein not mentioned, and all that it stands for? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject the glamour of Hollywood, and refuse to be mastered by the sin it portrays? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject Al Franken and liberal talk radio, and their boring works, and empty promises? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject the liberal media with their slanted reporters, and their liberal slanted news stories and skewed poll numbers? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject Howard Dean and the Democratic Party, and all their works and empty promises? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject the Congressional Black Caucus and all other liberal caucuses not herein mentioned, and all their works and empty promises? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject liberal PACs such as
MoveOn.org, True Majority, EMILY's List, Godless Americans Political Action Committee,
National Organization for Women, Green Power, Pac for a Change, Great American Shout Out, and all other liberal PACs not herein mentioned? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you reject liberal militant environmental groups such as
Greenpeace, Sierra Club, Friends of the Earth, Earth First, and all militant environmental groups not herein mentioned? All: I do.

UHLH: Do you believe in the Conservative movement as more representative of God on Earth? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you believe in the leadership of Presidents Ronald Reagan and George W. Bush, and their belief that freedom shall always reign. All: I do.
UHLH: Do you believe in the greatness of America and its influence on those countries that yearn for freedom and democracy. All: I do.

UHLH: Do you believe in Social Security Reform. All: I do.
UHLH: Do you believe in the appointment of Conservative judges? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you believe in true Conservative Talk Radio and the good news it puts forth? All: I do.
UHLH: Do you believe in Rush Limbaugh, Conservative Senators and Representatives, the spirit of Abraham Lincoln and the resurrection of true Republican power in Congress? All: I do.

God, the giver of Conservatism and the deliverer of George W. Bush in 2000,
has given Conservatives a new birth following eight years of debauchery in liberal politics.
May God keep Conservatives faithful to the goal of pursuing the true American rite of life, liberty, property, and the pursuit of happiness. Amen.

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Each year at Easter, Catholics renew their baptismal profession of faith, and here I thought it would be interesting to see how this would apply to Conservatives. A renewal of liberal baptismal promises to come later.

Comments:
This is great dude. I can't wait to see the Liberal Baptsmal Promise.
 
I plan to post the liberal version in April.
 
Interesting blog. Thank you.

I invite you to visit my blog and to study baptism and the Holy Spirit with me.

http://baptism-holyspirit.blogspot.com/

Terry Finley
happy.finley@gmail.com
 
Thank you Brother Terry. I am not worthy to wash the feet of the Lord.
 
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